I bought one of those Alexa voice assistants back in 2019, a little late to the game, but it seemed promising. I've since added one to just about every room of my house. Turn lights on and off, play music, set timers. It was a glimpse into the future. But in the years since, that future has not arrived. It has not changed. It has not evolved. If anything, it has actually lost features.

I'm not going to keep saying her name because she is sitting on my desk right now, and the second I do, she will light up and wonder what's going on. But that is kind of the problem, isn't it? She has not learned anything new. She can answer basic questions by pulling from a web search, but beyond that, she is just as dumb as the day I got her. Maybe even dumber.

Back in the day, I could add something to my to-do list, and with a little help from IFTTT or Zapier, I would get an email reminder. That was incredibly useful. Then Amazon, in its infinite wisdom, decided to remove that integration, effectively locking her in a cage. Now, if I want to see my list, I have to open the app manually. She cannot add things to my calendar. She will not notify me if I get an important email. It is like all she is good for now is turning on lights, playing music, and setting a timer.

Plus, with rampant price increases, I have to pay more every year for the same set of features. I remember starting at $9.99 / month for Amazon Music Unlimited. It's up to $19.99 / month now. I mean, that's better than having to make a trip to the store to buy a $20 CD just to listen to one good song, but not by much.

Meanwhile, AI tools are advancing at warp speed, but somehow these so-called smart assistants are stuck in the past. I have got a Google Assistant sitting on my desk too, just to test it out, but it is not much better. Why have they not integrated AI into these things? They could be so much more, but instead, they are just floating through space like an old probe that lost contact with its creators. Still sending out the same tired signal.

Maybe one day they will actually catch up. Until then, I guess I will keep using her for what she is best at. "Alexa, set a timer for ten minutes." At least she still knows how to do that.

So what about you? Do you have one of these devices? Are you using it for anything beyond turning on lights and setting timers? Have you found any clever applications that make it actually useful, or is it just sitting there, waiting for the future that never came?